CONFUSED SORA
Face My Fears
Headcanon.
Nagisa Momoe is a yandere.
Allow Kyubox to explain!
Mami’s base state is “Forever alone, lonely, so lonely, it’s lonely to be alone isn’t it Sayaka”.
The one time Mami stops being lonely is when Madoka promises to become a magical girl and join Mami at her side.
And then Charlotte kills Mami straight away.
Kyubox isn’t sure if you remember that part SO HERE IS A REMINDER!

Of course, when it’s Bebe that sops Mami from getting lonely no one dies.
To Kyubox, this infers that Nagisa/Charlotte/Bebe is actually a secret yandere who will murder-eat you if you try to steal Mami away from her.
Or just murder-eat Mami herself, hard to tell with yanderes.
Here’s another reminder in case you forgot!

[◕ ‿‿ ◕]
The following story is dedicated to lynx-you-fucking-nerd and meganekko-meguca because they didn’t want this at all.
Suffering! [◕ ‿‿ ◕]
———
“La la la, just an innocent little girl who did nothing wrong~”
Homura hummed cheerfully to herself as she skipped home from school, because if you pretend to be happy long enough then MAYBE you could trick yourself into becoming truly happy.
Obviously the universe was having none of that shit and immediately set out to run Homura’s day.
“La la laaaaaaAAAHHHHHH!”
Suddenly, ribbons appeared out of nowhere and tied Homura up!
“THIS IS BULL POOP! WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME!” Homura thrashed about and screamed obscenities but nothing she could do could get her free.
“DAMN IT TOMOE I KNOW THIS IS YOUR FAULT!”
“….I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Homura stopped her impotent and weak attempts to escape to stare, dumbfounded, at Mami.
Or rather, at the trashcan Mami was hiding behind.
“Mami. Mami I know you’re there.”
“……No I’m not.”
“Who am I talking to then Mami?”
“………….”
“BEING SILENT ISN’T GOING TO MAKE ME FORGET I WAS JUST TALKING TO YOU!”
“Uh…. I- I am a magical trash can! Have you been throwing away your rubbish like a good little gi-”
“I can see your ugly twin drills sticking out the side Mami.”
“GURL, I KNOW YOU AIN’T TALKING SHIT ‘BOUT MY HAIRDO!”
With a furious roar, Mami leapt out from behind the trashcan and punched Homura in the face.
“WHY?!” screamed Homura.
“SHUT UP, YOU KNOW WHY!” Mami snapped as she dragged Homura away.
“Where are you taking me woman?!” demanded Homura as she tried and failed to wriggle free yet again.
“Are you going to try and escape the whole way through this thing?” asked Mami.
“YES! Obviously!”
Mami paused to think once Homura gave her answer, then she drew a small picture of Walpurgisnacht on the ornate lock that is always attached to her binding ribbons.
“Here you go, now you can try and fail a hundred times in a way that you’re used to~”
“WOW, FUCK YOU TOO”
——–
——–
“And here we are!” Mami rang out cheerfully as she opened her front door.
“I can’t believe that no one even questioned why I’m tied up and being dragged through the streets. Like, no one even took a video of it on their phones to make a vine out of it or something.”
“Shut up Akemi, no one cares.”
Mami picked up the bound Homura and threw her onto her bed.
Mami’s bed, not Homura’s.
“I bet you know what’s going to happen next, right?” asked Mami slowly as she rummaged through her dresser.
“This is the part where we have sex” replied Homura.
“Yes.” said Mami.
“WAIT I MEAN NO! WHAT?!” Mami’s brain went straight into reverse as she tried to catch up. “WHAT THE HELL AKEMI?”
“This is what happens in all the fanworks you know.” Homura looked surprisingly bored with the fact that she could potentially be sodomized by Mami, who is also a futanari.
“WOAH WOAH WAIT, HOLD UP! THE HELL WAS WITH THAT LAST LINE?!” Mami Tiro Finale’d the fourth wall with her words, which shattered harder than her skull in Charlotte’s mouth.
“THAT WAS NOT NECESSARY DUDE!” screamed Mami.
“No one cares, Tomoe” drawled Homura carelessly.
Mami contemplated killing Homura right then and there.
“Oh shit” said Homura, reading the text through the wreckage of the fourth wall.
“Look, I don’t know WHERE you got these weird ideas from-” began Mami.
“From the internet, duh” replied Homura. “There’s like, a whole stack of doujins where you get into some kinky bondage crap with your ribbons and then stick your Onyx into someone’s Cloyster.”
Mami could feel a headache coming on as her happy childhood memories of playing Pokemon were slowly soiled.
“It’s usually me,” continued Homura. “Me or Madoka.”
“Right. I’m actually going to kill you just to make you shut up now” Mami said flatly.
“……Like, kill me with your penis?” asked Homura slowly and unsurely, as if she was unfamiliar with the concept of Mami killing her team mates.
You know, for some reason.
Mami almost cried out of frustration.
Almost.
It was that close.
“You want to be that way? FINE!” With whatever was left of Mami’s sanity snapping into tiny pieces (much like her skull inside Charlotte’s jaws) she quickly changed the position of how Homura was tied up.
“A tortoise shell style bondage technique!” gasped Homura.
Partly because of shock and partly because of what the ropes do to you.
Mami opened her mouth but quickly shut it. She didn’t want to ask Homura anymore questions.
She knew the dark knowledge would destroy her soul.
“So now what? Is this the part where you take off my clothes?” asked Homura.
Despite being the one not tied up, Mami could feel herself rapidly losing control.
There was only one thing to do.
“I’m going to seduce Madoka Kaname while you sit here and can’t move.” Mami stated.
“Oh shit that’s hot…. I mean, YOU BASTARD!” came Homura’s rather unconvincing response. Mami began to have second thoughts about whether or not seducing Madoka was a good idea but quickly ignored her doubts.
When has yuri ever been a bad idea, after all?
————–
————–
“Mami Tomoe” said Homura.
“…….Yes, Homura Akemi?” replied Mami wearily.
“You may be wondering why I am so calm, despite the fact there was a pretty good chance of me gargling your man mayonnaise.”
Mami resisted the urge to punch Homura.
“I noticed where this whole thing was going as soon as you punched through the fourth wall. I knew the punch line to this entire story.” Homura closed her eyes as she spoke, a smug smile creeping onto her face.
“Don’t say it Akemi. Don’t you dare….” warned Mami.
“I knew you would fail to seduce Madoka because of one important reason.”
“DON’T SAY IT AKEMI, I WILL SERIOUSLY MURDER YOU!”
“The punchline to this entire experience is that once again this is a KyouMado story.”
Mami raised her fist high, ready to smash it into Homura’s head before she stopped.
“This… I didn’t fail to seduce Kaname because this was KyouMado” said Mami. “This is a SayaMado story.”
“FUCK!”
Once again Homura Akemi suffered, and all was right with the world.
[◕ ‿‿ ◕]
Important note!
The chapters translations are made by OtherSideofSky. You can read the original raw text submitted by the translator in The Beast Lair along with epub versions.
Pro tip!
You should also read the manga. It has a sharp and beautiful art style and complements the story already being told in the LN.
Credits!
Thanks to Nakula for translating the initial version (2008) of F/SF Vol 1, and Mew and Food for the extra chapters to complete the final Volume 1. Thanks to OtherSideofSky for translating the Volume 2, 3 and 4. And thanks to Ryohgo Narita for writing Strange Fake!
Puella Magi Madoka ★ Magica + TAROT
↳ The Major Arcana Tarot cards represent a path to spiritual self-awareness and depict the various stages we encounter as we search for greater meaning and understanding in life.